My wedding dress had a train of ethically acquired peacock feathers on it. I'm going to let that sentence sit there for a minute for you to absorb... Shall we continue? If I read that sentence I'd hate the person who wrote it but alas, it's the truth. Were they really ethically acquired? Well, at least the woman I bought them from swore they were. She also charged me what I like to call the "not plucked premium."

The feather has a long and storied past in the fashion world dating back in the Middle Ages and has primarily been a sign of social status. From Venetian masks to the boas of Cancan dancers, the feather has tickled us for centuries. Read all about it here.

There was a time when wearable taxidermy was all the rage, friends.

It fell out of fashion largely because of what might be the first recorded animal rights campaign.

Today there are plenty of folks making hats from actual roadkill they come across like this beauty by James Faulkner:

Or perhaps this one by Margot Magpie for that special gent in your life.

Or this peaceful white winged bride by Bat Cakes Couture. You can read her artist statement on her Etsy store.

Or the evil twin. The model looks a little like Tippi Hedren.

The undisputed king of feather fashion, however, is Alexander McQueen. When I saw his exhibit in New York, I actually got teary. Just magnificent. It was as if he reached into the back of my brain and pulled out everything I always dreamed of.

Don't go hungry, model girl. You can cook and eat the eggs in your hat.

This bird is soaring on the sky of my torso, bucko.

Look to the future...far into the future.

This is exactly how I get dressed in the morning, truly.

This.is.beautiful. I can't even think of a sarcastic thing to say.

Head explodes in pure joy. I need a minute.

But let us not neglect your feet. You will be feathered from head to toe by the end of this piece.

These are fabulous. These are Dior.

Pretty pretty by Pedro Garcia.

Clips you can put on any pair of shoes by Kathy Johnson. Yes please.

Ok, these are scary. Yet magnificent. No, still scary.

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I present you with a foundation garment.

And those zany Victorians and their morbid jewelry. Hummingbirds. I saw a necklace just like this in the hunting museum in Cairo. I stood there feeling guilty but completely mesmerized.